Attitude Era Stars...Before They Had Attitude.

Ah, the Attitude Era. Remembered as probably the most successful boom period in Professional Wrestling history, the product was white hot, with even mainstream audiences and media captivated by the antics of the men and women who carried it to stardom. But wait: these guys didn't just apparate out of nowhere, right? Austin wasn't born from a beer keg and The Rock didn't just step out of a charisma portal. So who were these guys before??

1. "Stone Cold" Steve Austin

How You Remember Him: The Texas Rattlesnake, a beer swilling, middle finger waving anti-hero who kicked everyone's ass and didn't give a damn what you thought. Perhaps the biggest part of the Attitude Era, Austin was a phenomenal worker and perhaps even more popular than Hulk Hogan. Austin was so popular, a very famous segment has him squaring off with Iron Mike Tyson. Mike Tyson!!!

Austin became famous the world over for sticking it to the man, not afraid to go to extreme lengths to let everyone know how little of a fraction of a damn he cared about their thoughts on him. Some famous segments of his include filling the boss's car with wet cement, forklifting the car of another man on this list (that's for you to guess!!), driving numerous vehicles to the ring, and beating the hell out of fellow wrestler Booker T inside a freaking grocery store. The ultimate badass.

Who He Was Before: The damn Ring Master. Austin had a somewhat successful career in the now-defunct World Championship Wrestling, his run having lasted from 1991-1995. After suffering a tricep injury, he was fired over the phone, and by late 1995 he debuted in the WWF as a character known as the "Ring Master". Stunning.

 Ted DiBiase promoted him as a man "who no one had ever seen wrestle"...which was the most unbelievably stupid gimmick ever, because if you were a fan who even remotely paid attention, you JUST saw the guy wrestle in WCW earlier that same year. Thankfully, by 1996, he adopted his "Stone Cold" Persona, and in the following years he would be the driving force behind the companies biggest boom.


2. Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson

How You Remember Him: The Great One, a man who set the world on fire with his electrifying personality and literally everything that came out of his mouth becoming a catchphrase, Rock is undoubtedly a legend, delivering amazing one liners and very entertaining segments, followed up by a successful career in acting.

His ring work was just as entertaining as his promos, with a good ability to adapt to his opponents style. For those into acting, the Rock was able to come up with hilarious segments on the fly, spouting legitimately hilarious jokes seemingly from nowhere. He was also a man who has shared many a fantastic match with the likes of Austin and Hulk Hogan. Do you smell what the Rock is cooking?

Who He Was Before: Rocky Maivia. Taking the ring names of both his father and grandfather, Dwayne entered the WWF in 1996 at the behest of veteran wrestler Pat Patterson. He was heavily pushed by WWF to become a big star, getting his first big win at Survivor Series (phenomenal PPV). However, fans were very adamantly opposed to Johnson's character due to his unbearable cheesiness, leading him to adopt the Rock persona starting in 1997.

Things were very bad for Maivia early on, as his character was so disliked by fans that often times you could see signs in the crowd harboring extremely hateful and cruel messages such as "Die, Rocky, Die". Thankfully, Mr. Johnson was not one to take criticism while lying down, and pushed himself further to mold a character that took the business by storm.

Hints of his "Rock" character started to seep through during his late run as Rocky Maivia, where he would start to come into his own and use snippets of his phrases, such as saying "If you know what I'm cooking.". One outfit change and a boost in confidence later, and suddenly the most electrifying wrestler in the world is born.


3. Paul "Triple H" Levesque

How You Remember Him: The King of Kings, Triple H was a dominating force of the WWF during the Attitude Era as a leading member of the stable "DX", wreaking havoc alongside his partner and real life friend, Shawn Michaels. With the likes of other DX members X-Pac and Chyna, Triple H would play a magnificent heel, posing a major problem for other major players like Rock and Austin by imposing domination with his posse and an even bigger threat in his solo career.

Who He Was Before: Hunter Hearst Helmsley. Upon entering the WWF in the mid-90's, it was clear that Hunter would rise to prominence. He carried a "Regal" gimmick, portraying an arrogant, snobby wrestler....a gimmick that's dull and been beaten 1,000,000 times over. This didn't matter however, as Hunter immediately got into the "know" backstage when he got into the boss' ear.

Alongside Shawn Michaels, Kevin Nash, Scott Hall and a handful of others, Hunter was a big part of the infamous backstage group known as "The Kliq". With complete creative control, the Kliq would promote friends of theirs, and completely crush the careers of anyone who dared oppose them.

They remained unparalleled until an infamous event in 1996 called "The Curtain Call", in which the Kliq members broke character after an event, hugging one another in the middle of the ring. This supremely pissed off Vince McMahon who had allegedly greenlit at least a tiny portion of what happened, and the punishment was severe.

Two of the guilty members of Curtain Call, Kevin Nash and Scott Hall, were already out the door in favor of World Championship Wrestling, and Shawn Michaels was champion, preventing serious repercussion, so the blame fell solely on Hunter's shoulders, turning him from a star into a mid card guy for a long time before he finally came back on top with his Triple H character.


4. Mark "The Undertaker" Callaway

How You Remember Him: The Phenom....the mystical dead man of the wrestling world, all who know the Undertaker fear and respect him. He's such a powerful presence in the ring, you tend to feel sorry for whoever is fighting him, because it's likely they'll end up in a body bag (not really dead) or a casket. Or, if you're Mick Foley, he'll drop you from the top of a steel cage from quite a few feet above and send you crashing through an announce table. Absolutely. Terrifying.

Who He Was Before: Well....he was still technically the Undertaker. The only wrestler on this list to have been established in the WWF years before the others, he first made his official debut at a 1990 taping of the television show "WWF Super Stars" as "Cain the Undertaker", billed as a literal dead man completely impervious to pain.

As you can see above, he sported that greyish white mask for a very short time (due to King Mabel fracturing his orbital bone in 1995 because of a botched leg drop) before dropping it and readjusting his image in 1996. Undertaker would go through several transitional phases, where he dropped a fair bit of the "literally dead" thing. This new Undertaker was mostly used to introduce the last man on our list....


5. Glenn "Kane" Jacobs

How You Remember Him: A legitimate monster. A wrestler forever tied to the Undertaker, Kane was hinted at when Undertaker turned into his updated persona, with Paul Bearer threatening that he knew his darkest secret. This secret ended up being that he allowed his family to burn in a house fire...including his little brother, Kane. RIDICULOUSLY silly, but upon his introduction, Kane was no joke.

Billed as the Big Red Machine, Kane never spoke (at first), and began to tear his way through other wrestlers with his sights set on Undertaker. His size, outfit and demeanor were truly very intimidating, and he didn't have a problem with picking anyone and everyone up by the neck and slamming them into any object nearby, and the only man who's really meant to stand toe to toe with his "brother", Undertaker.

Who He Was Before: Glenn Jacobs carried many gimmicks before he settled on the one he's famous for...the most infamous of which is when he became "The Christmas Creature". Let me repeat that just in case your ears refused to hear it: He was the goddamned Christmas Creature. Very early in Jacobs career, he wrestled under several normal names, until he wrestled for the Southern promotion Smoky Mountain Wrestling as the Christmas Creature....who is...well...that. A creature that is somehow born from the mass marketing of the holiday season. Eventually, he came into the WWF in 1995, where he would bounce around from uneventful gimmicks before slowly evolve into the Kane character.

So there you have it! Those are some of the gimmicks taken by famous wrestlers when they were just younglings and trying to find their footing in the cut throat world of fake punching and kicking. Wrestling is wacky.

"Aloysius, the writer of this article has left his plodding foot in the internet world by writing stuff no one reads, but it doesn't matter to him because he's also known for a degree in Underwater Basket Weaving and one half of the legendary tag team, The Herk n' Jerk Connection."

Doink the Clown: Funny.... and Underrated

Allow me to take your mind back to the year 1993. The World Wrestling Federation was on unstable ground, going through a transitional period of sorts as Hulkamania was dying, and Macho Madness had begun to wane as well. The world of professional wrestling was losing its luster to the mainstream, and fast. Now that you know the state of the business, let me introduce you to Matt Osborne:

Or, as he is better known by his ring name, Doink the Clown. Matt didn't originally appear in WWF as Doink, however. He wrestled at the very FIRST Wrestlemania way back in 1985, simply under the name Matt Borne. He lost to Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat in the second preliminary match of the evening, and didn't appear again until 1993, where he took the Doink identity.

"But wait", I hear you say. "A clown? That's so gimmicky! He's doomed to a mid card spot." Maybe, dear reader, maybe. But you have to understand something. Just because he wasn't exactly someone Vince McMahon would pick to be World Champion, there was a LOT of patience and effort put into Doink's character that goes severely unappreciated.

So what makes Mr. Osborne's character so special? First and foremost, he was a phenomenal worker. He really gave it his all during his short tenure in the WWF, and it shows in his matches. Now, onto Doink himself. Consider Doink like the Joker of the wrestling world. Since as we know, wrestling is a stage show, let's look at Doink as if he were an entirely fictional character, like in a comic.

Matt Osborne, in character, couldn't handle his loss to Steamboat at the introductory Wrestlemania. His big moment to shine on the grandest stage of them all was snatched from beneath him, and this drove him into cuckoo land. Then, in perhaps the best build this character could've gotten, there was a very long waiting period. 1985 to 93, Osborne was never heard from. Eventually, in 1993, we started to see this clown figure amongst others in the crowd. 

What the hell?? Here is a sea of wrestling fans, and amongst them, sits a clown who sticks out like a sore thumb. Why is he here, and who was he?? And that's what was great. No one knew he was Matt Osborne, and no one knew why he was sifting through crowds of fans, playing little jokes on them and watching intently as other wrestlers performed. Even the announcers like Bobby "The Brain" Heenan and Randy Savage played up the eerieness of the characters sporadic appearances. 

Then, Doink made his official debut as a "heel" character. (In wrestling, the heel is the one who plays the bad guy in the stories.) Just by the promos he gave, you could tell this man was severely deranged. Much like The Joker, Matt Osborne adopted the Doink persona because his shattered mindset couldn't accept reality. He couldn't take that his shining moment was taken, or that Ricky Steamboat beat him clean. So he dressed up as this unhinged clown, laughing and playing simple, childish pranks, refusing to accept his status in the pantheon of professional wrestlers.

During his promos, he would typically have this mirror gimmick, doing the whole "Mirror, Mirror, on the wall" thing before delivering a small statement about whoever his opponent would be. He would often switch on a dime the emotion and intensity of his voice, becoming loud and bubbly, then immediately fixing his gaze on the camera, and in a low tone, threaten his opponent with something far darker and more ominous than you would expect a gimmick clown character to do. 

His demeanor and attitude changed so often you didn't know how he was going to react next. It was like he was battling with some split personality. The best example of this is when his facepaint started to rub off while in the ring. He would occasionally get serious, peices of his real face expose from beneath the makeup. He would do all sorts of wild and silly gimmicks, like introducing a secret "Second Doink" who would slip up from underneath the ring and distract a wrestler. That kind of stuff only added to the mystery.

Alas, the very same year he debuted, the Matt Osborne version of Doink was gone, having disappeared from WWF. The company would subsequently replace Osborne with other Doink characters, but it just felt....hokey at that point. Doink was now baby face, and became the very stupid kid-friendly gimmick he was initially assumed to be. The character would slowly burn out over the course of the next couple years as the costume bounced from person to person until the persona was eventually put to rest in 1995.

Doink was never meant to be a major player, or long time wrestler, so if they had let the gimmick die when Osborne left, that would be perfect. Imagine: A broken, deranged clown staggers in from who the hell knows where, does all sorts of odd, crazy things, and then bam. Gone.

This character was so well thought out, so meticulous, and well done, that it's a massive, massive shame that it had to go so unappreciated. He really was a fantastic character and a really hard worker to boot. He would further do stints as Doink or updated versions of the character in ECW and independent promotions, but Matt would never remain at any of them very long.

Unfortunately, Matt Osborne passed away in 2013 due to his unfortunate personal afflictions with addiction, but it can be said without question that his character left a huge impact on the WWF, and was sure to grab the attention of fans the world over.

Rest in peace, Mr. Osborne. You will always be an integral and well remembered part of WWF history.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?list=FLp2ZisyRmLk8qeQLvH43Uqw&v=PvyD2iOJOuk

For point of reference, here is an amazing promo he did on fellow wrestler Tatanka. Doink!

My First WWF Hasbro Pull

Well, hell. For as long as I've been a fan of anything, regardless of the source material, collecting memorabilia on it has always been integral to my enjoyment. The same is true for pro wrestling, something (for as wild and wacky as it is) I'm VERY passionate about. Always have been. That said, I haven't had the chance to collect MANY wrestling figures.

The last I remember having were the modern-ish Hulk Hogan and Bret Hart figures (mostly to rectify the Wrestlemania 9 injustice). I decided now was the time to fix that, so I've decided to dabble in the famous and beloved Hasbro figures.

Browsing eBay, I happened upon a lot that was currently being bid on. Not really understanding the average price for these things, I just threw a bid in and saw what happened. I knew they were sought after, and so I somewhat reluctantly let my bid steadily reach up to $50. Truth be told I expected the bid to come down to the wire, and more dedicated and perhaps affluent collectors to start dropping big bucks.

Much to my surprise the clock ticked down and I ended up winning the bid! Here's a nice photo for ya:

Sure, I didn't land a Hogan or an Undertaker, but I'm happy with what I have. The roster is as follows: "Macho King" Randy Savage, Ultimate Warrior, Doink the Clown, Greg "The Hammer" Valentine, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, Texas Tornado Kerry Von Erich, and the Honky Tonk Man.

I ended up with replicas of Ultimate Warrior and Macho King, both of which I gave to my brother, for whom I care the world. These may not fetch pretty pennies alone but I figure (aha, ha.) that it was still a good way to get my foot in the door with these neat things. 

Now I'm not crazy or wealthy so I doubt I'll ever go after those ungodly mail-away figures of Hogan, Bret Hart and The Undertaker. As much as I like them, and as lucky as I feel, these bad boys are PRICY. So from here on out, collecting them will be a slow, occasional process.

I'll keep you updated!!!